"I used to be with it. Then they changed what "it" was. It will happen to you!" -- "Grandpa" Abe Simpson
Last night, I celebrated my friend's 40th birthday with the aging vanguard of Chicago hipsters. As my friend and her husband are primarily musicians, the room was filled with people who had played with bands like the Smashing Pumpkins, Filter, Dovetail Joint as well as many bands who deserved to go national but never did. Also included were actors who had had bit parts on "Seinfeld", jewelry designers, and a hodgepodge of workers from the nonprofit sector. Consult your history books if this sounds unfamiliar, kids. See the last paragraph for amusing Smashing Pumpkins tidbits.

Yes, Ubermilf was kickin' it old school last night. Actually, it's the only way Ubermilf KNOWS how to kick it, since she IS old school. My only problem with getting older is this: Baby Boomers have ruined aging just as they have ruined most things. Before, there was something of a template to follow for getting older. No more. Baby Boomers, in their fervor to deny that they are no longer the cool kids, have viciously clung to youthful pretension. Like Dick Clark, they insist on eternally remaining teenagers. They have effectively eliminated that middle ground between the club-hopping 18 to 34-year-old demographic and the golfing retirees.

I don't want to pretend I'm still a young hottie on the prowl. I want to be a smoldering sophisticate sipping martinis at a jazz club. I want to attend art openings and view foreign films. Then, I want to go home and pay the babysitter, get up and make cinnamon rolls and coffee, and read the Sunday paper. I know, who says I can't (or don't) do these things? I do. I just can't find clothes to do them in. I know this sounds shallow. It is shallow. But part of the fun of going out is getting dressed and coiffed, at least for me. And I don't want to wear hip huggers OR Floridian resort gear. I want elegance. I'm not getting it unless I'm getting really fancy, like for a wedding. Where are my jazz club clothes??!!

Anyway. Back to last night and amusing Smashing Pumpkins tidbits. The band that played was "Los Borrachos," my absolute favorite party band of all time. They were formed as a pick-up practice band and gained a loyal cult following. They take hits from the 70's and 80's, change all the words to Spanish and put them to a salsa beat. This includes bands like AC/DC, Van Halen and various disco artists. They have a segment called "Stump the Borrachos" where the crowd yells out a song and they have to play it or buy you a shot. Caveats: no Swedish disco a la Abba, and at least 2 other people in the crowd have to have heard of the song. I stumped them with "Master and Servant" by Depeche Mode. I've never stumped them before. They've now added "no Depeche Mode" to their caveats.

Billy Corgan of the Smashing Pumpkins actually had Los Borrachos play his birthday party in the mid-90's. Let's just say it's a good thing he doesn't speak Spanish. I'm going to leave it at that. Another tidbit: way before pumpkins became famous, a group of my friends saw them play the Metro. They were ... not good. In fact, they became a benchmark for us. When someone went to see a band, and gave a negative review, the question was always, "Were they Smashing Pumpkins-bad?" And the answer was typically, "Well, not THAT bad." And lo and behold, who makes it big? Again, no justice in this world.

I bid you adieu. Oh, yes, Happy Mother's Day to all.
Name: Übermilf
Location: Chicago Area

If being easily irritated, impatient and rebellious is sexy, then call me MILF -- Übermilf.

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