Point + Counterpoint: Miss Muffin v. Squirrel

Squirrel: Who the hell are you and what're you doing on my porch?

Miss Muffin: Piss off, vermin.

Squirrel: Fuck you, cat! Where's my damn crackers?

Miss Muffin: C'mere. I'll show you.

Squirrel: Right. You think I got so old and fat bein' stupid? Get off my damn porch.

Miss Muffin: Come down and make me, you fleabag crumb-beggin' mother fucker.

Squirrel: Oh no you didn't!

Miss Muffin: That's right. Come teach me a lesson, or else shut your nut hole and get lost.

Squirrel: I ain't goin' nowhere. I was here first! I was born in this tree.

Miss Muffin: You're gonna die in that tree.

Squirrel: Big talk from a little cat on a porch.

Miss Muffin: I'm gonna kick your mangy ass!

Squirrel: That's not what the mouse says.

Miss Muffin: Screw you!

Squirrel: No, screw you!

Miss Muffin: Screw you!

Squirrel: No, screw you!

(continue for an hour.)

Opinions expressed by today's editorialists may not reflect the views of Übermilf.
Name: Übermilf
Location: Chicago Area

If being easily irritated, impatient and rebellious is sexy, then call me MILF -- Übermilf.

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