It seems that some of my fellow Americans are not grateful for my willing sacrifice to raise good citizens who will one day help lead the nation when they themselves are old and gray. They don't care that I am making sure my children learn to read and get an education so that they may help cure diseases or create great art or discover alternative fuel sources some day. They aren't thankful that I took on the burden of incontinence when I sneeze or cough, or waking up to the sounds of a retching child at 3 a.m. in order to take care of the child and her laundry while most of them lie blissfully asleep in bed.
No, that's not good enough. That's not enough to earn their respect. According to them, I need to have a tight tushie and perky boobs. Because that's what's really important.
In 1970, “Our Bodies, Ourselves,” the seminal guide to women’s health, described the cosmetic changes that can happen during and after pregnancy simply as phenomena. But now narrowing beauty norms are recasting the transformations of motherhood as stigma.
Stigma? For what?
I'm not advocating neglecting one's health. Moms should always make sure to eat right and exercise to keep themselves well, to care for themselves. Certainly. But instead of viewing those unavoidable body changes that accompany motherhood, not to mention aging in general, as normal and natural, they are ... shameful? Have we forgotten what the word "shameful" means?
Being rude, greedy, insulting, petty, cruel, judgmental -- all of these behavior choices are occasions to be ashamed of oneself. If anyone wants to look down on me because I don't artificially alter my body to pretend I'm something or someone I'm not, they can feel free. I'll even make it easier for them by running around naked screaming, "Look at me! They're stretch marks! And REAL FlOPPY BREASTS! Look at my CELLULITE! LOOK AT IT! LOOK AT IT!!!!"
I'll then laugh maniacally and bend over in their direction, so they can get a good, long look at my "deformities."
Meanwhile, I will enjoy this mockery of their value system:
I love that. LOVE IT.
