Journey to the Christian Condo, Part I: Mo' Money, Mo' Money, Mo' Money

This weekend, we traveled to Dilf's sister's condo for her birthday. It's the first time either we or Towel Boy had been there. Given the family she had married into, we weren't sure what to expect. But it was only for 3 hours or so; how bad could it be?

Suffice it to say I have material for more than one post on the subject.

Anyway, I had some minor quibbles from the start. Mr. Mustache (that's what I will call Dilf's sister's hubby, because he has a bad 70's porn star mustache; I will call Dilf's sister Mrs. Submissive) is a huge fan of Thomas Kinkade. I think Thomas Kinkade is an agent of Satan. That's just a matter of personal taste, however, like the bad porn mustache and the penchant for nautical décor and the powder blue carpeting.

Something else bothered me far more. It was the giant Prayer of Jabez magnet on the front of the refrigerator. Why does that bother me more than lighthouses everywhere and a net full of fake plastic sea creatures in the kitchen?

The "Prayer of Jabez" is plucked from an obscure Old Testament story to both justify greed and beg God for money. Because that's what's important in life. Money and the stuff if can buy you. So, in order to get it, you should bombard poor God -- who obviously doesn't have anything better to do than to listen to you whine about how you want a beach house or a jacuzzi or a plasma TV -- with this annoying incantation until he can't stand it any more and gives you what you want just so you SHUT UP already. It's the Christian way of saying, "Please? I really want it! All my friends have it. Why can't I? I'm going to scream until you give it to me!"

I'm not alone in this sentiment. I found this online, and these people obviously feel the same way as I do.

Anyway, that's a small thing. There's more. But that's just one of the first things I noticed. More on their odd, odd family tomorrow or so.
Name: Übermilf
Location: Chicago Area

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