Dr. Sardonic in his labratory, sporting another experiment in facial hair (file photo)We learned of this frailty when Uberdilf (AKA the “Techno Kid) and I were dispatched to collect the good doctor from the airport to attend a conference of a select group of fellow superheroes. As we watched luggage spin past on the conveyer belt, we were told to look for a large, teal suitcase. We were alarmed when Sardonic grabbed a smoke blue case and said, “Let’s roll.”
When Sardonic noticed our shocked expressions, he sheepishly admitted, “I guess it’s time to tell you: I’m colorblind.” We were momentarily speechless. As I noted earlier, it is quite common for superheroes to have weaknesses. We just always assumed Sardonic’s limitation was his chronic absent-mindedness.
This other flaw came into play later in the evening, when Sardonic left his gadget-laden lab coat in the back seat of our car. His worldly goods should have been transported in Sysm!’s vehicle, as he was staying in Sysm!’s lair that evening. Needless to say, with the assortment of vitally important and potentially explosive devices housed in the pockets of his signature garment, Dr. S and Sysm! came to the Uberabode early the next morning to pick up the coat.
The four of us reached a joint conclusion: it was time for Dr. Sardonic to get a sidekick, someone like the Green Lantern’s Kato, to help him with his mundane concerns. We helped Sardonic complete the necessary Hall of Justice requisition form, and he received an almost immediate response.
Yes, Sardonic would get a sidekick, but no, she would not be female and wearing fishnet stockings. Knowing that Sardonic would never keep his mind on science with a distracting sexpot around, they sent a manservant named Clyde to attend to his needs.
Unfortunately, Sysm!’s requisition form for a better superhero name went unanswered, for the third time. Better luck next time, Sysm!
