Other people can drive down the street without incident.

Oh sure, there's the occasional accident. But that's merely annoying or tragic... not truly bizarre.

Not so with Dilf and I. Longtime readers may recall the time a colossal rubber penis came bouncing down LaGrange Road toward us.

Then, there was the time a school bus full of grade school children assaulted Dilf with a salami sandwich.

Dilf was driving to work, an odd occasion in and of itself because he usually took the train. But he had to transport some equipment into the city, so he took the car. It was autumn, a lovely day, brisk, but not too chilly. Dilf had the window cracked to enjoy the cool air.

That was his downfall.

An unruly crop of hooligans in a school bus in an adjacent lane of the highway spotted his car pulling up alongside them. They were likely en route to a field trip to a museum or such, but they should've been going to a juvenile detention facility, because they threw one of their classmate's sandwiches -- a salami and mayonnaise sandwich on white bread, to be exact -- out of their bus window and through the small, narrow opening of the window Dilf had but merely cracked open an inch or two to let in some air.

It landed on the face of the instrument panel, leaving a smear of creamy mayonnaise across the glass. One bite had been taken out of it prior to its launching.

Dilf's reaction followed this sequence: startled, angry, admiring. Yes, it was dangerous. Yes, it was disgusting. But you had to admit, it was a one in a million shot.

For a look at someone else who's one in a million, let's look at a video about another February holiday, Groundhog's Day: