An unspoken yet underlying notion lies within the abortion debate that makes me unable to completely embrace either side of the issue: that somehow babies are a punishment instead of a gift.

As in, "why should a woman be 'punished' for having sex," or "if you didn't want the 'consequences' (punishment) of having sex, you should've kept your legs closed."

Babies require self-sacrifice, maturity and responsibility from their parents, and that's a terrifying, life-long proposition. It's difficult enough to reach within yourself as a parent and pull those things out, especially at 3 a.m., but I can't help thinking it's worth it.

Of course, my children were conceived through love, and when I look at them I don't have to remember coercion, violence or the asshole who knocked me up and then ran away, as some girls/women might. I'm not trying to say everything's roses.

But it's not the babies who are the curse. It is the violence against women, it is the incest, it is the entering into sex before emotional maturity catches up with physical maturity, it is the temporary nature of our attachments that are curses. Why focus on the pregnancy, without looking at these larger issues?

And what if we ALL took responsibility when a woman got pregnant? If we all helped, instead of thinking, "that's someone else's problem?" A baby should be a blessing not just to the parents, but to us all. Why isn't it? Why is it viewed as an onus instead? And after the child is born... well, we all know how our tax dollars are spent. It isn't on children.

Instead of "teaching abstinence" in this day and age of easy porn access and cable television, we should teach children exactly what goes on with their bodies, how everything works, and why sex is so important to them and the entire world.

We should work to find the root causes of violence against women, pedophilia, and abusive sexual practices, instead of just dealing with them after the fact.

Also, we need to re-think what brings us true, lasting happiness and fulfillment. Stability, attachment and community have become underrated, and cheap thrills, instant gratification, and pursuit of individual gains have become overrated.

I blame Mountain Dew:



Seriously.