I Doubt My Swiffer Can Help With This Mess
I was going to write an amusing blurb about the naked tickler, who has been breaking into little old ladies' houses and tickling their feet.

However, I got sidetracked by the menacing cloud of African dust headed our way.

According to reports, "An enormous, hazy cloud of dust from the Sahara Desert is blowing toward the southern United States, but meteorologists do not expect much effect beyond colorful sunsets.

The leading edge of the cloud -- nearly the size of the continental United States -- should move across Florida sometime from Monday through Wednesday.

Ooh, pretty. Colorful sunsets, you say? Why, how wonderful! Only... that's not what they were saying about these clouds earlier.

From August, 2001: "Now a new study, partially funded by NASA, has revealed a surprising connection between red tides in the Gulf of Mexico and giant dust clouds that blow across the Atlantic Ocean from the distant Sahara Desert. NOAA and NASA satellites can spot such dust clouds en route from Africa to the Americas, raising hopes that space-based data could help scientists predict when red tides will strike the Gulf coast." Do you remember what red tides are? "It sounds like a story from the Old Testament: Without warning, the sea turns a shade of reddish brown, killing scores of fish and other marine life -- and making the water an unwelcome place for humans."

More recently, "Tests on airborne dust samples collected in the Caribbean were found to contain infectious spores of the [aspergillosis] fungus. Scientists suspect the spores had been carried on the wind from Africa, before landing on the ocean surface, sinking and infecting the sea fans. Enough had built up on the ocean floor for the disease to spread. Since then, several outbreaks have been linked to dust clouds."

Complaints about these dust clouds were reported by earlier scientists such as Charles Darwin. But if our vigilant media tell us there's nothing to worry about, I'm sure they're right. I'll just get out my swiffer and wait.
Name: Übermilf
Location: Chicago Area

If being easily irritated, impatient and rebellious is sexy, then call me MILF -- Übermilf.

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