Dear Dilf: News from Home
Okay, Dilfie, I realize your plane hasn't even landed in New York yet, but there is news from home.

Item! Blueberries.

The crazy Belgian next door brought us 10 lbs of blueberries from Michigan.

That's right; 10 lbs. I will wash them and freeze them for future baking. The pies. The struesel-topped muffins. The blueberry compote served over vanilla ice cream. Yes, I can see it.

I won't freeze them all, though. Expect blueberry pancakes on your plate Friday morning.

Item! Dying coyotes.

Well, it could be merely sick. Of course, it could be rabid. Of all the things it COULD be, it definitely IS in my parents' back yard, laying down in the afternoon. That can NOT be good. FYI: the roadrunner is nowhere to be found.

Upon calling animal control, grandma and grandpa were informed that they only handle tame creatures like dogs and cats. But An actual threat to personal safety? Sorry, gramps, you're on your own. They have to call a private trapping company to remove the foul beast.

The three-legged racoon must have let the other forest know my parents' yard was THE place to go to die.

Item! Our yard.

No dying animals back there that I know of. There is some strange guy back there hacking at the hillbilly rainforest along the back fence and corners. He's also mowing the front and back yards and edging and weeding up there, too.

All for the bargain price of $15 more than I paid our nephew! He's going to give me a quote on how much de-hillbillification will cost in the back yard.

He even moved the giraffe and other assorted girlie toys himself. I am pleased.

Don't worry; he's not all that cute. And he's all dirty and sweaty and stuff, so, no worries. Of course, if he offers to come back Wednesday night and take out the garbage for free...

Nah. I think I'd rather take out the garbage myself.

So, that's all for now. If any more exciting developments erupt, I will let you know.
Name: Übermilf
Location: Chicago Area

If being easily irritated, impatient and rebellious is sexy, then call me MILF -- Übermilf.

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Now, who wants cupcakes?

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