I don't go to PTA meetings (yet), but I am a member
and I do what I can to support their efforts. Since I'm friends with many of the PTA officers, sometimes they approach me to find out if I'm interested in volunteering for this project or that project. Since I'm planning my re-entry into wage slavery, I volunteered to take on some tasks that pertain to my career -- so I have more recent work samples than, say, those from the last millennium.

That's how I wound up in charge of the yearbook, the website, and, theoretically, the newsletter. Except I don't have the newsletter, because the Crazy Lady won't give it up. She won't give up her other voluntary positions, either. Even though she has no children at the school. They have packed up and moved on to Junior High and High School. She refuses to do the
same. She still shows up on registration day, to "take pictures for the newsletter," and on the first day of school (seemingly neglecting her OWN daughter's first day at Junior High) to "take pictures for the newsletter, and at Market
Day because she's bat-shit crazy.

Now, truthfully, I tend to have a soft spot for eccentrics. I am making an exception in this case, because:

• She is lacking in both computer and writing skills, and has
  no business writing the newsletter in the first place;


• She is mean-spirited and petty (for instance, taking pleasure
  in the fact that a fourth-grader broke her arm while roller-skating,
  simply because she doesn't get along with the girl's mother);


• She is standing in my way.

I am technically involved in the newsletter; I am the "associate editor,"which means I look it over for typos and errors. I don't know why I'm doing anything at all, since the PTA told the principal they had washed their hands of the newsletter when she didn't have the ovaries to ditch Crazy Lady. It's not a PTA function at all anymore -- it's under the principal's jurisdiction.

So I have a plan. I will pleasantly, sweetly and annoyingly turn everything in to the principal -- since she's in charge of it and all. I will make her realize it's much more of a hassle to keep on Crazy Lady than to get rid of her. I will bombard her with newsletter-related issues until she explodes.

I may be evil, but at least I'm not crazy.