I'm writing this post with a particular person in mind, but it could be for anyone -- male or female.

When you have your first child, it's like being dropped into a foreign country with limited instruction, a substandard field manual and with nearly no grasp of the language.

On top of learning an entirely new culture, new parents have a completely helpless, dependent life attached to theirs, whose survival depends upon them adapting to and thriving in this unfamiliar territory. Some people enter into this terrifying yet exciting venture on their own. Some people choose the "buddy" system. Unfortunately, sometimes those "buddies" let them down.

Imagine turning to your travel buddy (who has vowed to be with you every step of the way) for help or support, and hearing "I think I'd rather just do this part-time. I'll be back on Saturday. See 'ya." Or, alternatively, "You learn the language, handle all the financial exchanges, learn the local customs, and I'll just go sightseeing with you. I just want the fun stuff. It's much too hard work for me!" Or, "I'll sit here on the couch. TAKE MY MOTHER WITH YOU."

Or, when the stress of the culture shock, made all the more difficult to manage by sleep deprivation and disorienting frequent changes to the local code of conduct to which you must adhere, causes you to turn to that partner for comfort or relief, do you want to hear, "I don't know what you're making such a big deal about. Can we talk about this later? I'm busy ... in my native country. In which I'm very comfortable, and don't want to leave."

Consider: which type of partner do you want alongside you? Which type of partner do you want to be?

What kind of travel partner are you, right now?

Take your time to decide; you have your whole life to consider it. Just don't expect anyone to be there beside you if you choose the selfish course. Eventually, your partner will become acclimated to the new culture, and will live their permanently. If you don't change alongside, you will be left behind.