6 days a week for their 12 cent monthly wage
Your cakes might not taste as sweet after you find out they were produced using Third World child slave labor.
The King of Cake has enslaved children throughout Southeast Asia to labor in his agonizingly hot bakeries. The children reportedly earn less than a penny a day to churn out an endless supply of confections for the greedy monarch.
When confronted about the practice, the King of Cake chortled merrily, "More dough for me!" Then he added, "My lawyers assure me it's not slavery as long as I pay them. And they do choose to work for me, you know."
The King of Cake is referring to the advertising campaign used to lure the children into his evil baking trap. Utilizing every corporate spokesman at his disposal, the King has employed his old friend and known pervert The Pillsbury Dough Boy to entice the children into his shops:
Children's advocate Larry Helper explains, "The King of Cake promises these children fun and treats. What he gives them is forced labor and leg shackles. They bake for 12 hours a day, then are shoved out the door, exhausted and coated in flour and powdered sugar."
Mr. Helper's eyes welled up as he continued, "They smell those delicious, delicious cakes baking all day long. They frost them and decorate them, ... and," Helper paused to dab at his eyes with a hanky, "They don't even get to lick the bowl!"
Think about that the next time you lift that cake-laden fork to your mouth.
