- I used to daydream that I was a secret love child of Han Solo and Princess Leia, sent to Earth to save it with my as-yet undiscovered Jedi powers.
- I used to self-intoxicate by spinning in circles. I guess everyone's done that.
- My parents bought a dishwasher AFTER all of us had moved out; I missed play practices and speech team practices because I was doing dishes.
- I missed out on going to Paris in high school because I didn't want to burden my parents with a request for money.
- I want to re-live the years 1984-1995 and do it right this time.
- I frequently think about giving myself a pedicure yet never do it.
- I forget about paying my car insurance bill until "The Daily Show" announces the night's date, then I can't fall asleep because I'm thinking I should pay the car insurance bill.
- I never have any socks. Where the hell are all my socks?
- I should really throw out 80 percent of my underwear and buy new stuff.
- I wish clothes were disposable.
- I want another cat.
- I want to name him Noodles.
- I want to know how to tile. I want a backsplash in my kitchen and to de-hillbillify the upstairs bathroom wraparound shower liner.
- I don't really hate Nick.
- I don't understand people who hate Halloween. or any holiday for that matter. It breaks up the monotony, people!
- I hate monotony and routine. I would rather take on a daunting challenge than do laundry and pay bills.
- I like daunting challenges.
- I've never punched anyone. But I did get chicken pox from biting my brother when I was 4.
- I dread getting the mail. I hate the mail. My mailman is nice, though.
- I love looking at catalogs, even though I realize they're just trying to con me into buying stuff and that trying to evoke a feeling through purchasing things is idiocy.
That's 20.
