With Apologies to Randal. Maybe. Unless He Disagrees with Me. Then, Screw Him, Too.

I became incensed at my library today. I was coming in to pay a fine. I had returned the materials a few months ago, but had never paid the fine for their lateness. I will let the letter I sent via email to the library administrator describe what happened:

Dear [Library Guy],

I am not sure who is responsible for collecting fines and enforcing their accompanying policies, but I know you are, and that you will pass my message on to the appropriate person.

Recently I amassed fines close to $200. I returned the materials, save one book, but apparently not before they were considered irretrievable. So, despite the fact the materials are in the library's possession, I must pay the full cost of replacing them -- plus fines in excess of $120.

I paid $100 today, which is not enough to reinstate my lending policies, according to "the manager." I do not know who this person is, although since the desk clerk referenced a "she," I assume the position is filled by a woman.

She may erroneously think she is doing the library a favor by taking such a hard line on policy, but perhaps she needs a broader vision -- one that includes the knowledge of exactly who funds her paycheck.

I already pay for the library through my taxes. In the past, I wouldn't have hesitated to support a referendum asking for an increase in tax funding for the library. Now, I no longer view the library as a social asset, thanks to the draconian and unbending, and may I add cowardly, woman who decided not to negotiate any sort of deal with me. I may be one person, but I doubt I am the only one who has been punished and humiliated by this "library policy."

I don't know the legalities involved in charging me for materials which remain in the library's possession, nor do I remember if the fee structure was explained to me fully upon the issuance of my library card. I may be interested in learning these things. I'm sure I can find that information, like so much information formerly found only in libraries, on the internet.

I sincerely hope you take measures against the erosion of goodwill toward the library. $200 is an awful lot of money to expect someone to pay for returning materials late to a publicly-funded institution.

Very truly yours,

Name: Übermilf
Location: Chicago Area

If being easily irritated, impatient and rebellious is sexy, then call me MILF -- Übermilf.

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Perverts, scram. There's nothing for you here.

Now, who wants cupcakes?

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